I Love/Hate Running

I’m fairly coordinated, but not really. I can dance, do kata and look graceful. I can run with beautiful technique, even if I do have knock-knees. However, add a ball into the mix and oh, boy, something breaks down in my brain.

That’s why I loved running! It was easy for my body to do (relatively). I ran cross-country and track all through high school and I loved it. I worked hard to run smoothly. It was freeing. I wasn’t particularly fast, but I enjoyed the rush. My favorite was competing in the 800 meter run. Just long enough to be a challenge and short enough to not get bored. And the last 100 meters when you give it your all? Dang, there is nothing like that final push on your body! Exhilarating!

Except all of a sudden I hit college and something changed. I don’t know what happened, maybe it was the high altitude, or my body decided this wasn’t something for me to enjoy anymore. I went running and found myself wheezing, coughing and tasting blood in the back of my throat. It stayed with me the rest of the day. It happened the next day too It soon became the norm, sadly. Especially if I went at the speeds I used to run as a younger athlete. Or the distances I used to run.

I suspect I have exercise-induced asthma but I refused to be seen for it. I had tried albuterol inhalers and there was no change except palpitations after running. I was beginning to hate running. It just meant pain, and not where I expected it to be. My lungs would feel ragged and rough. The coughing and wheezing were just nasty. I had two small children and it seemed as though the jogging stroller just exacerbated and aggravated my wimpy lungs. I decided to put running aside for a while.

Last weekend I decided that after a 2 year break and another baby I should be able to run, right? Maybe a two block run wouldn’t cause the yuckiness. Alas, just a cough for two days. But that is ok, I will prevail! I have hope that I can go running again. It will be a good day when I can go out and run with no complications or fetters on my lungs. I suppose I just need to slow down my pace and cut my distances for a while and slowly build them back up. It isn’t much but it is a plan. The hardest part will be telling myself to slow down.

What do you wish you were able to do again?



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